This post is an FYI of this post.
I just need to say that this is extremely vulnerable for me to share. Okay. That is all. Proceed.
For the curious, here are the sort-of “guidelines” for my mouth.
Disclaimer: I try to be flexible, as there is always Grace, so please remember I’m human, I have slipped and imagine I will slip again in the future.
- Negative opinions are not worth sharing, whether they are about people, events, experiences–whatever. They are not productive; they are just little “wins” for the ego to feel important and since ego is dead [Please reference this entry] and needs to stay dead, you mustn’t feed it. Opinions are relative and not fact.
- Don’t repeat negative opinions or ideas, because repeating them means to perpetuate them on an energetic level. It will be felt in the environment by unnecessarily bringing a low and heavy mood or tone. It’s also completely unproductive in every single capacity.
- If it won’t be productive, don’t bother. You don’t have to cover up silence with unnecessary words. If you get in a situation where you feel the urge to fill gaps of space with words, first question why you feel that way. Breathe. Let it go.
- If you’ve started to say something unnecessary and you catch yourself, it’s okay to interrupt yourself. Half the time the listener doesn’t mind being saved from the pointless story anyway.
- Speak the truth in love. If you’ve spoken the truth outside of love, quickly apologize (but do not defend your unloving behavior by saying, “But I did this because,” or, “If you had just…”).
- If you don’t prefer something, you don’t have to announce it: Promote what you love; don’t bash what you “hate”.
- You don’t have to be right. (Also, “right” is subjective. You will never know the whole story.)
- The answer is probably silence or within it. Not the judgmental kind of silence, but the silence that understands, hears, and sees everything as good.
Caveat: If you are sincerely diluted in your perspective and are struggling to hear or understand a Divine response, it is okay to reach out to someone to help process whatever discomfort is arising. Stay productive within the conversation: do not meddle in the emotional interpretation of the event as it will only hinder the healthy processing of it. Stay focused in the purpose of its airing: it is not to complain; it is not to gain approval or validation as the victim of any situation. The purpose is to find perspective, to see outside of the little me. If the party with whom you are sharing becomes emotionally stimulated by your situation, cut it off immediately and continue waiting in silence as before party was ever involved. An emotional uprising is counterproductive.